Issue link: http://viewer.e-digitaleditions.com/i/85232
"MY WAY OF DEALING WITH IT WAS INITIALLY TO WITHDRAW, BUT MY DARLING HUSBAND BOB WAS HAVING NONE OF THAT AND WE TALKED AND TALKED." women that they had breast cancer, they needed a mastectomy, they needed ongoing treatment - I don't know how they do it, but it is done with such a lot of dignity and warmth that is extremely comforting, As with myself, shock was the first reaction from family, colleagues and friends. As I became angry and the "why me" came out, they became the calming influence and we jointly started planning how "we" were going to deal with this. Planning is good therapy and it forces you to look wider and work out how you personally are going to deal with the situation. My way of dealing with it was initially to withdraw, but my darling husband Bob was having none of that and we talked and talked. It was absolutely the right thing to do. My sister was diagnosed with breast cancer six weeks after my mastectomy - we became quite competitive in so far as who was recovering best, whose surgeon was the cutest and how many squares were in the ceiling above the radiotherapy machine! My female family and friends were simply awesome - my grand-daughter, Marli now aged seven made me laugh every time I saw her. She was fascinated with my "pretend booby" and would want to see the prosthetic every time she visited. I was given as much time off as I needed and during the time I was having radiotherapy I left work early every week for five weeks. Although I am back to full health now, for several months after the radiotherapy I would get very tired in the afternoon and again, I was encouraged to leave work early and rest. Gallagher and my colleagues could not have done more for me and I will be forever grateful. There is definitely a deep sadness when diagnosed and I too experienced this, but I decided that I had to open up and let people know how I was feeling - so my dear friends and colleagues were my rock. Without their support and their willingness to listen to me, life would have been so much more difficult. You really do have to find that safe place where you can talk about your fears, laugh at the situation whenever possible and cry when you want to. I also found reading and a nice red wine made a big difference. Also a hug goes a long way!!! For many, having a life-threatening illness such as breast cancer makes them 'wake up' and start living life to its fullest. I really didn't have a big wake up call, but I did take a good hard look at what is important to me and whether I was connecting with some of the things in my life that I considered important; family, friends, my career. I plan my days more carefully so I can include family and friends. My career has always been a big part of me and I continue to treasure this. I looked carefully at the food I was eating and also commenced taking supplements such as Vitamin D and Fish Oil and Bob (husband) and I try to get to our beach house at Bowentown as often as possible. Not sure if the Fish Oil is helping but it is certainly helping my arthritis. I have tried very hard not to make my breast cancer become the driver of things I want to do. Of course it is naive of me to think that this isn't in the back of mind! I did make a conscious decision to give back to the breast cancer community and I am now a Trustee of the Waikato Breast Cancer Research Trust. My goal is to eventually retire in continuing good health, continue to participate in the community and perhaps do some further study My greatest pieces of advice would be don't internalise your feelings, become knowledgeable about your breast cancer and do whatever you need to do, to make you feel in control. If I could describe my breast cancer journey in three words they would be 'Get a Mammogram' or 'Que Sera Sera'. Margaret Comer I decided really early on in the journey to focus on myself… to do the things I enjoy, the things that give me a reason to keep going. Susan B. Breast Cancer fighter