Her Magazine is New Zealand’s only women’s business lifestyle magazine! Her Magazine highlights the achievements of successful and rising New Zealand businesswomen. Her Magazine encourages a healthy work/life balance.
Issue link: https://viewer.e-digitaleditions.com/i/49418
her short story feature Jonno THE LUKEWARM AUTUMN SUN shines through the bevelled glass windows sending rainbow coloured shapes onto the chapel wall behind the celebrant. It's a sign, thinks Eloise. A sign for her only child, Jonno. Her thoughts return to the past. Jonno was fascinated by rainbows as a boy. He loved how light would splinter through her crystal dream catcher and send rainbows dancing round their living room. She loved how he 'caught' rainbows in his pudgy little hands and gave them to her saying, 'Here's a present Mummy 'cause I love you.' Then, worn out from his rainbow hunt, he'd fall asleep on the old Chesterfield and Eloise would send up a prayer of thanks for Jonno. In what had become a tarnished world, he was her pot of gold. Solo motherhood hadn't been easy but watching Jonno grow into a talented academic, musician and artist, admired by all who knew him, made the hardship and the struggle all worth it. Her heart filled with pride each time she walked out of high school interviews, the teachers' comments spinning round her head. 'Jonno has everything going for him.' 'Jonno has what it takes.' 'Jonno has the world at his feet.' 'Jonno has depression.' Three words that changed everything. She remembers clearly the conversation she had with the doctor. 'Depression? You've made a mistake. Jonno can't have depression.' 'Well the Ham D score shows he ...' 'He's just going through a phase, surely? A bad case of teenage angst? You know how they can be.' But the doctor assured her there was no mistake. The medication took forever to kick in. Jonno withdrew from her. He withdrew from the world. The same world that a short time ago was at his feet was now threatening to trample him to. Death. She didn't want to think about her son taking his own life. She'd told him that people who did that were selfish. They didn't care for anybody but themselves. Jonno promised her he wouldn't. But he promised her he wouldn't smoke pot either. Lies. She'd found a tell-tale plastic bag full of the destructive dried weed in his sock drawer. That and a bank statement. Why would someone with an Eftpos card need to draw out large amounts of cash? One reason. Dealers didn't carry Eftpos machines in their back pockets. Eloise tried to back off but couldn't. How could she? Jonno was her flesh and blood. She had to protect him. Why else was she put on this earth but to keep her son from harm? She nagged at him to eat a decent meal, get some exercise, stop smoking pot. Couldn't he see that his lifestyle was making his situation worse? Jonno got so far behind at school he dropped out. He became unrecognisable. He grew his hair so it covered his face. She hated seeing him looking like a homeless kid. Did he have no self pride? 'It's what a lot of kids do,' explained her counsellor the first time they talked. 'If they have their hair over their face then no-one can see them. It's a shield from the world.' 'But I want him back in the world,' Eloise said as she reached for the tissues. 'I just want him back.' "And he will be back, Eloise. It's just going to take time.' Then the unthinkable happened. He started drinking. He 132 | December/January 2012 | HER MAGAZINE